DAY 15: Passed Quarter of my Goal. Learnt to control my Body

Ok..  I learnt a lot about myself today. I learnt that I can control my urge despite watching P***n. I learnt that the feeling that I can get after fapping can be brought by just doing Yoga. I learnt that it is not the Porn that is affecting me. I learnt it was my habit of Masturbation.

For the last two years, I have been doing it for at least 3 times a day before sleeping. Yes.. Three times. I’m talking about a busy day. If I was free, I would do it more than that. Anyway, I went on the links on Google that stated that Over masturbation causes all the stuff I’m suffering from now.

Anyway, Let’s go and talk about what I did during the day.

Woke up quite early. I told my mom that I had some homework so, I woke up like 7:45 today. I should say I felt okay. I looked at some navel pics and deactivated my fake facebook profile. I’m doing this for a reason. I will explain later. Got ready. Grandma left today.

Off I went to Java Lessons. Finished File handling. My laptop ran out of charge. Despite having charger, I was unable to charge it because I had an european plug. This is India. They have the circular socket. So, I asked the teacher and she gave her circular plug charger. I used that and off I went home.

But.. wait. I realised I had a Yoga lesson. So, I went to Yoga classes. I should say it was pretty relaxing. That feeling that you get after fap. That’s exactly what I had. I learnt some basic Yoga stuff like Surya Namaskar and Pranayamas (Breathing Exercises). During Pranayamas, you are meant to hum and saying “oo” for the vibrations. But, my voice was just being so rough I couldn’t say any of it properly. Then, there was one SimaAsana. This Asana you pretend to be a lion and posture yourself like a lion. Just exhale like a dog. I couldn’t stop laughing.

Anyways, she moved on to other exercises. It was pretty relaxing I should say.

I came home after that. No one was at home. Mom had gone to the bus stop to drop my grandma off. Now, this is when I set myself a goal. I told myself I’ve been seeing a lot of sexual simulating stuff for the last 15 days. Since I’m quarter my way to my 60 day goal, it is time to make it harder. I told myself:

No more viewing any kind of sexually simulating stuff from tomorrow!

From tomorrow, I will not take the phone to toilet to look at some navel pics. No more peeking and looking at some P stars when you are horny. No more Karlee Grey. No more nothing. From day 15 – day 60… It is just going to be work, work and work.

To reward myself for reaching 15 day goal, I told myself I’m allowed to look at P**n as much as possible. But, one thing. No FAPPING!

So, I looked at all sorts of images. Naked. Navel. Belly. But, just today. No more from tomorrow. To be honest, I’m not addicted to porn. I’m addicted to fapping. I’m addicted to the feeling I get after a fap. That’s it. So, I did look at all these pics. Went on NSFW posts on reddit. But, didn’t fap. I did leak precum here and there. That’s about it. I never touched my ding dong.

Also, I’m thinking of doing the resit here. Not in UK. I got informed by my faculty that the exam can be done over here. So, yeah. Tickets to London are quite expensive now.

I have sent an email to the exams office. Hopefully, they reply by tomorrow.

I didn’t go the Internship today. Since I was tired from Yoga and was a bit horny, I couldn’t be bothered.

From tomorrow, it is going to revision. Classes. Yoga. Let’s go. Day 60. Here I come.

 

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